Refresher: Where You Sit Creates Connection

When supporting people in distress, how we physically position ourselves can communicate as much as our words. This week, we explore a simple yet powerful mini-intervention: "Sit next to, rather than across."

Positioning yourself beside rather than across from someone can transform the interaction.

This approach aligns with suicide-specific evidence-based interventions like the Collaborative Assessment and Management of Suicidality (CAMS) approach and the Attempted Suicide Short Intervention Program (ASSIP), which emphasize collaborative, side-by-side therapeutic stances rather than sitting opposite the person (Jobes, 2016; Gysin-Maillart et al., 2016).

Sitting side-by-side:

• Symbolically demonstrates that you're working together as allies facing the problem
• Reduces the confrontational dynamic that can occur in face-to-face positioning
• Creates a shared perspective, literally looking at the situation from the same angle
• May reduce the intensity of eye contact, which can be overwhelming during emotional distress

Important Consideration: Respect Personal Space

While this intervention can be powerful, it's essential to be mindful of the person’s preferences and comfort. Be sure to: 

• Ask permission before changing your position: "Would it be okay if I sit next to you?" 
• Be attentive to non-verbal cues indicating discomfort
• Recognize that cultural, trauma-related, or individual factors may influence comfort with proximity
• Offer rather than impose this positioning change

The goal is to create safety and connection - never to add discomfort by encroaching on personal space. If sitting next to someone isn't appropriate or welcome, the spirit of this intervention can still be honored by moving your chair just a little more side on or closer or through verbal affirmations that communicate "I'm with you in this."

By thoughtfully considering how we physically position ourselves in relation to someone in distress, we can create a subtle but meaningful shift from confrontation to collaboration.