Being gentle with others and yourself

As the new year begins, many of us will be picking up tasks, routines and deadlines from before the holiday period, or perhaps embracing new ones as part of a resolution or intention-setting process for the year ahead. 

Frameworks like these can provide useful structure in some circumstances. But the pressure we put on ourselves to do things in a certain way or within a certain time frame can also feel overwhelming. And the stress this can cause has the potential to negatively affect our mental health.

These pressures can also affect someone working on their recovery. While having goals to strive for is important, we also need to remember that healing isn’t linear. The demand that things happen by defined dates or that certain milestones need to be met to show progress can actually hold people back.

When supporting someone who is working on their recovery, there are a few phrases you could try to show not only your commitment to them, but also how important it is for them to be gentle with themselves as well.

You could try saying:

“I know you are concerned about getting back to work. How can I help you work towards that? Would you like to set a goal that doesn’t feel overwhelming?”

“I’ve heard you say you are disappointed that you haven’t felt well enough to start attending your book group yet. We all heal at a different pace, and I know that when you are ready they will be grateful to see you.”

While setting your own intentions for 2024, be as gentle with yourself as possible. Consider adding in some space or activities that will give you the opportunity to breathe and to slow down from time to time.